Monday, 11 February 2013

The Rings of Lordy 2: The Legless Bandit

In the hours after his last Adventure, our titular Hero Lordy has taken refuge in an old man's basement.

 Lordy: But really. I can't express how grateful I am for your hospitality.
 Intrepid man: Why are you doing this to me?!
 Lordy: You'd never believe the trouble I got myself into...
 Intrepid man: Oh God. Oh God I can believe anything now!
 Lordy: And then this guy, Lucien, showed up with these new clothes...
 *Sounds of coughing and spluttering*
 Lordy: Oh man are they comfortable.
 ...
 Lordy: I swear though, he just crept on me while I slept.
 ...
 Lordy: I guess it's okay since he gave me this attire.
 ... *Twitch*
 Lordy: Hey, why aren't you saying anything?


Comon bro, you're embarrassing me.

With a sigh, Lordy left the basement. He had slept there after all, so it was of no more use to him. He crept up the stairs and out the front door - and into the streets of The Imperial City.

Lordy swept across the streets of the metropolis; sword in hand, he was sure that this time no one would catch him in the wrong. All the while he went he was met by odd looks and terrified smiles. "Put that sword away!" was the usual greeting from the townsfolk; and he was sure to return it every time.

 Lordy: Citizen! I instruct you to find me something to do!
 Citizen: If you're looking for work, you should visit the Fighter's Guild.
 Lordy: I see. I shall go to this Fighter's Guild, and become the Champion Fighter.
 Citizen: Don't talk to me jerk.

Lordy scoured the streets once more in search of the Fighter's Guild. Using his sword as a tracking device, he attempted to sense the presence of powerful fighters so that he may be guided by their knowledge in his search.


Come on Powerful Fighter! Where is the Fighter's Guild?


...


Gufufu, better.

Much to his surprise, it seemed his woman-insulting antics had been long forgotten by the police. That matter had become irrelevant, however, as his life now had some sort of goal. He would find the Fighter's Guild, no matter how long it takes, and he would become the Champion Fighter.

Lordy continued searching. Ever and ever on he went, his hopes of finding that special place never dwindling. Soon darkness crept across the city, and Lordy knew his time was up. He needed to find a place to sleep before it was too late.

At first he considered the basement of that old man; but then it hit him. He had greater things to aspire to, and a far more many places to go - for at his first encounter with the creep-master Lucien Lachance, he had been given a note. That note is important, Lordy thought, as he watched it gust through the alleys and streets of the market district and onto the waterfront.

...

Lordy followed it soon after.

 Lordy: Hmm? What's going on?

Lordy was surrounded. Several pirates jumped him as he boarded the ship that his important note had landed on. Many swords lined his throat.

 Lordy: Come on guys. It's just there.

The important note began fluttering in the breeze.

 Lordy: Oh guys. Come on.

It had soon picked itself off the ground.

 Lordy: Seriously guys.

Making little cartwheels through the air, the important note drifted away.

 Guys.

It was not long before it had swept entirely out of sight.

 Seriously.

The Pirates made no attempt to move.

No comments:

Post a Comment